‘Your ex is in every picture!’: Woman’s Mother-in-Law Makes Scrapbook Birthday Present Prominently Featuring Husband’s Ex Girlfriend

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  • 01
    MiL presented bday book with pics of OH's ex... Am I Overreacting?
  • 02
    For my husband's birthday his parents (read: MiL) have made him a photo book of his life. Lovely! Part way through the presentation of the book I notice lots of photos featuring his ex (they split 8/9 years ago, she cheated on him and broke his heart, then caused issues with us in the first couple of years - we've been together for 7 years and have just had a baby).
  • 03
    We get to the middle section and there's a double page spread of her and him together - at a sports event, on holiday, etc etc. There are no photos of any of his other relationships, or of him and his friends (easy to find on Facebook/instagram etc - or to ask me!).
  • 04
    I feature at the end (some truly bad angled photos AA ) and right on the last page there's one of the side of my head amongst photos of him with our baby as a newborn. I felt hurt and bewildered by the inclusion of the ex in such a pronounced way.
  • 05
    She featured in a few clear 'sections' of the book that didn't need her presence - eg her enjoying a glass of wine with his mum at their holiday cottage, her sat at the table with his mum's extended family, photos from a trip. His folks have been noticeably weird with me since our baby was born (I have posted here before) and I can't tell if my sensitivity over this is in my head as a result (my OH seems to think it is).
  • 06
    I didn't know what to say as I stood there holding their grand baby staring at these photos of his ex girlfriend being celebrated in a bound book. MiL knows that things have been tricky with the ex- she has asked me about it and we talked quite openly about it in the past. I don't really want this thing sitting on display at our house, it feels super odd to me...I've said this to my partner, and explained that it felt upsetting and insensitive at best and targeted at worst, and he thinks I'm ove
  • 07
    Edit/Update: So I've just remembered that OH told me about how horrendously MiL treated this ex when they were together (when we clocked she was bullying me last time we saw her a few weeks ago). What is going on there?!
  • 08
    שוש. smilegirl01 - 3d No way not overreacting. That's super weird! I've been with my DH for a long time, but prior to being with me he had dated a girl for 4 years during high school and into college. We actually went to the same high school and I remembered them looking so cute together! Lol Now if my MIL made a book of his life I would expect and totally be okay with say a prom photo with her because I know they had a decent young teen relationship, their relationship ended fine, and she was l
  • 09
    DarkSideof Taco • 3d Exacto-knife cut the pages out. No one will notice. ☆ 77 ♡
  • 10
    Spearmint_coffee ⚫ 3d • If it were me, I would probably tell her in my most sincere tone, "Wow, this is such a thoughtful gift! I love seeing all these pictures of him!" Just so MIL wouldn't think she won. Then make the book disappear in a box in the attic. 80 ↓
  • 11
    artsy Pebble 3d My MIL did this with my husband. Gifted him the books the Christmas after we got married. They were full of "the one God made for you" "We knew it was meant to be". There was a spread with another ex with comments along the lines of "she wasn't the one" and "glad you didn't end up with her". Nothing of me and him. Sad thing is, we grew up together and the ex they didn't like is the one I was rooting for him to stay with before we finally dated! 49
  • 12
    ScaryBrandon • 3d Yeah, dump the book - its disrespectful to your marriage. As for MiL you should probably gather a bit more probable cause to justify confronting or taking any action against her but definitely keep your boundaries high and strong, especially with that baby. Hopefully its just a one-off where she really liked how she looked in the picture or the cottage or something and wasn't flipping you a fat middle finger but that'd probably be a naive assumption. 20
  • 13
    mrspreto ⚫ 3d My dad's second wife (wife after my mom) is this weird with my 2 brother's gf's. I didn't see her often, but whenever I visited she would incessantly | about whoever either of my brothers were dating. She HATED any current gf. I am still FB friends with one of the ex gfs who she used to complain about non-stop. She's lovely. One day we went somewhere together & bumped into this same ex and my brother's mom couldn't stop telling us how wonderful she is and she always hoped my brothe
  • 14
    MNGirlinKY. 3d Toss it. Just throw it away. You don't need this in the house. When and if they ask just say "you somehow included pictures of the woman who broke Husbands heart, we tossed it" 66 CroneDownUnder • 3d I like the simplicity of the "somehow" here - no speculation or accusation, just bewilderment and pain. Let anyone who cares fill in the gaps. 21
  • 15
    m2cwf • 3d What's happening is that MIL thinks your husband belongs to her, nobody else is good enough for him, and she would do this with ANY partner that he ever chose. She's a bully about it, and she's always been a bully about it. She's okay using the photos of the formerly hated ex now, because ex is not the current threat - you are. And you've recently become an even bigger threat after having a baby with him, hence her making her bullying more overt than usual. Big hugs, she sounds awful
  • 16
    agreensandcastle 3d Answering specifically your edit. She hates losing her baby to any woman. She will use anything to torture his current relationship. Ex would have received a similar book if ex was still the partner. He is wrong, you're not. Couples counseling is recommended. 62
  • 17
    heymomlookatme13 • 3d I'd "misplace" the book..right into the trash can Ga1aticOverlord • 3d My thought exactly 66 ہے 433 зд
  • 18
    ApparentlyaKaren ⚫ 3d • Definitely not over reacting or being snarky. This is manipulative behavior at best. Vindictive and purposely hurtful at worst. Your husband should read some of these comments. 12
  • 19
    introverted_smallfry ⚫ 3d . No that's just weird. There's no reason to add her unless they had a kid together and some photos of her with the kid are added. I'd feel some type of way to. Your S/O is wrong about you "overreacting". Not sure why he would enjoy seeing her throughout the book like that.
  • 20
    Extension_Sun_377 • 3d If you don't want to confront her then the best way to deal with it is to act like you never even noticed. That will her off far more, if her plan to bully you didn't work. If you comment, say what a lovely gift it was and if anything is brought up about the ex say - really? I honestly hadn't noticed. She wants a reaction - you will get to her even more if you don't give it to her. But obviously, find other ways to keep her well away from you all in future. 21

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